I Dearly Love a Laugh
by Satan'sPixie
Summary: Hey, this is a random and insane story that's based on an idea from prettyflour. Umm...it's not really a romance but ejoy if you like crazy stuff. : Rating for language later on. Set 2 years after BD. I don't own 'Twilight', SM does.
1. Oops and a Kiss

_Hey, so this is my new story called "I dearly love a laugh". It's based on an idea I had while reading pretty flour's 'My Shiny Freak' (which I really recommend reading by the way) and this chapter at least is dedicated to her. _

_In case you didn't know, Alice's greeting is based on a 'Twilight' avatar that I found and __**love**__!!!!!!!!_

_This is only the information but I'm basically going to do loads of random stuff. If you have any ideas then let me know and if they're funny and random enough I might use them and dedicate a chapter to you._

I ran without stopping, all the while keeping my mind focused on my would-be-pursuer. '_Don't move, don't move, don't move._' I thought desperately as I fled. My short cherry coloured hair spiked up on end due to the wind. Even though I was far enough away that he'd never catch me I carried on running as fast as I could. Suddenly I froze. There was the scent of a vampire that I didn't recognise as I whipped my head in their direction, my mind focused to ward off any attacks.

She was very short with short black hair that spiked the way mine did when I wasn't running. Like all vampires she had very pale and smooth skin but unlike most (and like me) she had golden eyes. Cautiously she walked over to me at a human speed, probably so as not to alarm me.

"Hi, my name's Alice Cullen and I can see the future. I knew you'd be here so I came to meet you. Why don't you come and meet the others Valkyrie?" She smiled.

"Umm…others?" I gulped, I wasn't too sure of how they'd react to me.

"Yes, I live nearby with my family. Don't worry, they'll love you." She smiled again. I could instantly tell that she was a total ball of energy and like Flubber on Prozac, Alcohol and **huge** amounts of sugar all at once.

I ended up agreeing with her and we ran back to her home. It was a huge white Victorian style house with one entire side of it being made of glass. As we approached seven other vampires, one shape-shifter and a half-vampire walked out. (The only reason I know about shape-shifters and half-vampires is because _he_ was part of the crowd that was supposed to witness the destruction of the Cullens two years ago).

"Alice, you'd better have a good explanation for why you just ran off." A tall blond male who was covered in scars and instantly made me nervous frowned.

"Sorry Jazz, I had a vision that Valkyrie would be where I was supposed to meet her before I expected so I went to go and find her." Alice smiled again before grasping his hand. Another blond male who seemed a little older that 'Jazz' as Alice called him stepped forward.

"My name is Carlisle, you've already met Alice who is holding hands with Jasper." He said gently before gesturing to various members of the group. First he gestured to a tall male with messy bronze hair and a female with long mahogany hair.

"This is Edward and Bella." He them pointed at a tall male with curly black hair who had his arm around a tall blonde female who was incredibly beautiful to say the least.

"That's Emmett and Rosalie." He pointed to the shape-shifter who was massive with russet skin and black hair. Next to him was the half-vampire who had ringlets in the same shade of bronze as Edward and chocolate coloured eyes.

"That's Jacob and Renesmee." Then he put his arm around a female with soft waves of caramel coloured hair.

"And this is Esme." They all greeted me in a very friendly way.

"Hi, I'm Valkyrie Ducaine." I smiled.

We were sat inside talking when Edward suddenly looked at me.

"What was that you were thinking?" He asked.

"Huh?" I thought back and realised I'd been thinking about the events from earlier.

"Oh! I was just thinking about my gift." I said suddenly embarrassed.

"Ah, that's what it was. Mind control, that's an interesting one." He nodded.

"What? How did you?" I was amazed that he knew.

"I can read minds. I'm not the only gifted one in the family; Bella's a shield, Jasper's an empath and Alice can see the future." He explained.

"Thanks, and Alice already told me that." I smiled.

"Mind control? I wonder if Bella's shield can block it?" Carlisle wondered.

"There's one way to find out. Valkyrie, can you try and make Bella do something?" Edward asked.

"Ok." I nodded. '_Kiss Edward, Kiss Edward, Kiss Edward._' I thought hard. A little too hard perhaps. Nothing happened. Or at least Bella didn't kiss Edward.

"EDDIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! COME HERE!!!!" Emmet yelled before trying to give Edward a huge kiss. Luckily for Edward he could move so fast that he was out of the room before Emmett had even got over to his seat. Edward ran outside and Emmett followed before chasing him around.

"Oops." I said while trying to lock onto Emmett's mind.

"What happened?" Carlisle asked, looking dumbfounded.

"Sometimes if I'm concentrating too hard I influence more than the person I'm trying to." I mumbled, still quite occupied.

"AH! Got him!" I grinned. '_Stop it, stop it, stop it._' I thought.

When we'd eventually calmed Edward down (who was really freaking out over the fact that his brother had tried to kiss him) and explained what had happened it was very late at night. Not that that bothered us. When Emmett heard about my gift he grinned like a little kid in a sweet shop.

"We could have some fun with this." He said, looking really excited.

_I hope you liked the chapter! Remember, if you have any ideas then let me know. Sorry this one has been kinda boring but I promise that randomness and insanity will be resumed next time. __J_


	2. Important Author Note

_**IMPORTANT AUTHOR NOTE!**_

_Hey guys, this is an author note just to say sorry it's been so long since I've updated any of my stories. Unfortunately my laptop was infected by a virus which completely killed it so I had to wipe my laptop completely and the wireless internet was one of the things that was removed when it was wiped. I've only just got it back on so I'll be able to start updating more often now. I'm really sorry guys, thanks for being so patient._


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